I see you sitting at the window with your prayer shawl, praying each morning for us, your mother and all your dear ones. So many prayers, and so little it helped you. You were always angry, short tempered and on the edge of explosion.You were scary, at times you were a monster, and I had no where to hide.

You hid your demons behind your smart suits. Everyday together we would pick out your tie, that was the highlight of my days. You gave us beautiful toys, but with every gift there was a caveat, which manifested itself as guilt, always reminding us that were your burden. I married a man just like you, I gave him everything so he would love me, but it was never enough and he left. Nine years after your death, I break this pattern. Today I write the next chapter of my life and no longer will I live in the shadow of someone else's unhappiness.

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